What is a Mentor?

by Francis Kong

Types of Mentors

According to writer David Spinks, there are 3 basic types of Mentors in this world. What kind you want depends on you and the person you will end up calling your 'Mentor'. No one type of Mentor is any better than the other, in fact, I've found that having a combination of the 3 types of Mentors work the best. Who ever said you could ever only have 1 mentor?

Type 1: Passive Mentor

I can ask them questions once in a while.
I’ll always get a response but it may not be prompt.
It’s possible that they have no idea I consider them to be a mentor.
They want to help, but aren’t necessarily concerned about my career.

Type 2: Committed Mentor

I can ask questions whenever I want and will usually get a prompt response.
I feel comfortable asking for an introduction.
They recognize that I consider them to be a mentor.
They care about my career and like to stay updated.

Type 3: Mega Mentor

I will get a prompt response whenever I have a question.
I connect with them regularly on a professional and personal level. (They’re a friend too)
I can turn to them for help with pretty much anything and they will help me.
They’re always asking about my career and trying to help.
They want me to succeed.

For me, I very much enjoy being the Type 3 Mentor and having Type 3 Mentors. Yet, I've been a Type 1 Mentor many more times than the Type 3 or the Type 2 for that matter. This is something that will develop naturally between you and your Mentor. Remember, the most important thing is not to force it, but let the relationship develop naturally.

What to Expect from a Mentor

Always remember, having a mentor is a privilege. A Mentor should not be taken advantage of. Here are some guidelines in building a great Mentor relationship:

It not all about you.
Many mentors expect something back in return; for the most part its just your appreciation. Mentors are here because they hope to give back in a very special way and that by helping you, you'll help someone else down the road as well. Many of the best Mentorship are mutually beneficial, where the Mentees also become assistants to the Mentors from time to time.
Set reasonable expectations.
Your Mentor is here as a volunteer on their own time. Please remember that they do have lives and can not always help you at a moment's notice.
Do not ask your Mentor to do work for you.
Definitely ask them for support and advice. Never ask them to do something that is your responsibility.
Try to contact your Mentor even if you don't need help.
One of the hardest things to do is to stay in touch with people. But it is important to 'drop by' and say 'hello' to your Mentor in between your crisis situations. They will start seeing you more as a friend and will definitely try to go that extra mile for you.
Do not force it.
Once again, its important for this to happen naturally. This is the foundation of all Mentor relationships. Set up times to meet with your mentor face to face (either in person or via teleconferencing if they are around the world). If you both click, great! If not, no harm, no foul. Just search for other Mentors.

Finding the Right Mentor

Finding that right Mentor is a very special thing. You can not go looking for a Mentor like you would a job interview. Here's the secret: Finding a Mentor is not about trying to find a Mentor at all.

Finding a mentor is about opening new boundaries and connecting with people who can help you see things in brand new ways. Its about shifting your focus from who should be your mentor to letting your mind explore what is it you want in life. If you have no idea what you want in life, then find as many Mentors as you can and ask them how they finally found out what they wanted to do in life. Use the EdgeOnCollege Goals function and let your mind explore all the paths you're curious about, and it will present to you all the best Mentors to start you off on your journey. The beauty of EdgeOnCollege is that your Mentor could be someone half way around the world and after a few clicks and message exchanges, you both could be ready to start face to face teleconferencing as soon as you want.

So if you don't have a Mentor, but are looking for one (or two or three), don't panic. Put yourself out there and start making those connections and meeting some great people!